Sticky bombing the fourth wall
by Cybernetic Author unit 5
Summary: I break the fourth wall to talk to the TF char about fanfiction, just read it and review I own none of the TF characters
1. IntroPairings 1

Alright, because I'm bored and no one has been reviewing my other story, I am making a little series of forth wall breakings.

Demo: Aye, and guess who's coming through tha hole!

Shut up Demo, anyway, this might not be funny now, but I promise it should get better, anyway, I have both teams gathered here to discus what they think of the current fanfics.

Spy: Fanfiction, stories written by crazed fangirls, and their about me, just kill me now.

Later spy, later, anyway, first topic: pairings!

Spy: oh god

One of the most popular pairings is spy and sniper.

Spy: Sacre blue!

Sniper: Alright, I'm leaving.

You both stay put, we're far from over.

Scout: Hey, do I get a girl? Do I huh? huh? do I?

You are usually paired with spy

Spy: Alright, will someone please kill me now? 

Scout: What? I get paired with the spook?

Yes you do

Demo: what about me?

No one likes you Demo, you don't get anyone, the closest you get to a pairing is Engineer and soldier as your drinking buddies.

Demo: and people wonder why I get sauced all the time

Heavy: What about heavy? What happens to Sasha?

You and medic are usually paired together

Medic: Mein gott!

Heavy:….

Heavy, are you alright?

Heavy:….. Listen very closely leetle baby writers, Doktor is good friend, nothing more, Doktor is friend to everyone on team, and if anyone says otherwise, I will have to go get Sasha.

Pyro: Hudda hudda huh [what about me?]

I'm going to have a separate chapter about you pyro, as you're my favorite class and no one really knows what you are

Pyro: Yaaaaaaay! [Yaaaaaay!]

Engineer: Do I dare ask who I get?

You usually already have a wife back home, but you are sometimes paired with Pyro

Engineer: Pyro?

Pyro: hrrr? [Me?]

Yep.

Engineer: No comment

Pyro: Hur he huuuuuuuur hur hudda hur! [I will buuuuuuuuurn you all, burn!]

Soldier: What about me? I do not have time to feel love, love is for the weak, and I am not weak.

You are usually in love with the statue of liberty.

Soldier: Alright, that makes sense

Well that's about it for now, please feel free to ask questions for the team to answer!


	2. Q&A 1

Alright, we've gotten some questions.

Spy: Just get this over with.

Alright, first ones for scout, why do rainbows make you cry?

Spy: On second thought, this might be worth watching.

Scout: RAINBOWS DO NOT MAKE ME CRY!

Spy: Yes they do, a few month ago I saw you staring at a double rainbow and blubbering like a baby.

Scout: I hate you so much.

Alright, second one, Medic, do you have a wife?

Medic: I have married five times. Unfortunately, all of my vives have had unfortunate accidents a few veeks after ze wedding.

Riiiiight, anyway, next one is for Soldier, why do you call Medic 'sweatheart?"

Soldier: It's called smack talk maggot, why do you think I say 'cupcake'?

Alright, Engineer, someone asks how you fit everything in one small toolbox and how hitting things with a wrench repairs them.

Engineer: Well, the toolbox just has some important parts in it, the rest is made from scrap metal I find lying around, and as for hitting things with mah wrench, it's the same thing, I'm hammerin out the scrap to upgrade mah buildings.

Alright, finally, Pyro, someone asks when your class video will come out; they also say that they love you.

Pyro: hwwwww [awwww] ny wy, r dnt nw wn my wdw wll cm rt, bt I hp ts sn. [Anyway, I don't know when my video will come out, but I hope it's soon.]

Also, there is a fan made meet the Pyro video that looks like the real thing, you can find it on youtube.

Demoman: Aren't there any questions for me?

No Demo, I'm sorry, maybe next time.

Demo *grumbles*


	3. Q&A 2

Alright, Demo, you finally have some questions.

Demo: Yes!

First off, to put it politely, and to decrease the chance of getting a needle in the face, have you been 'seeing' Medics wife resently?

Medic: Vat vas zat?

Demo: ********* no, I wouldn't go within five feet of that lass, even if I was sober!

You mean drunk.

Demo: Nope, I mean sober, drunk is tha norm for me.

All right, someone else asks if your afraid of becoming a Demoknight with all the swords your getting.

Demo: Well, if I did people would start making black knight jokes, and I always like a good boom, so while I may use tha occasional charg'n'targe, I'll always coom back to my sticky bombs.

Uh huh, anyway, someone wants to challenge you to a Scottish dance off.

Demo: Yer on! Lett me go get mah kilt!

Alright….. moving on, spy, someone wants to catch a spycrab, what do you suggest?

Spy: Not another spycrab reference, you do one thing for the fans and you regret it for the rest of your life, anyway, a true spycrab can only be found in eizer ze badlands, ze sewers of 2fort or double cross or in the heart of France, You should find some in the countryside, as the noise of cities scare zem. Be careful of tentaspies and mimes, both are natural predators of ze spycrab, other than that, your on your own, zey are extremely rare in the best of conditions.

Thank you spy, next, someone asks if anyone here would kiss medic for 1,000,000$

Medic: ZAT ZAS ZAT?

Scout: Not for all da money in the world man, I like my arms, you don't think Engineer cut his hand off to make dat gunslinger, do you? Truth is, he ticked Medic off.

Spy: For once I agree with ze boy

Engineer: No way

Heavy: Why do people pick on doktor? And nyet, I vould not kiss doktor, ever.

Pyro: No

Soldier: Do I really need to answer that maggot? Cause the answer is no, no and no again!

Medic: Dumkoft fangirls

Alright, next up, heavy, have you baught a new bed for Sasha yet?

Heavy: Yes! And Sasha is very happy! Got nice king sized bed right next to me! Thank you for asking leetle fan!

Alright, someone else asks if they can buy a sandvitch

Heavy: No, sandvitches only for heavy and team, special recipe is top secret, kept in briefcase.

Okay, Scout, how do you feel about Spy taking your dads job?

Scout: Say what?

Spy: Ha ha ha ha ha!

Scout : Oh, you mean those pics, (though i burned dem all) well…

Spy: His fazer died three years ago.

Scout: Shut up

Perhaps we should talk more about this some other time, anyway last question, others will be answere later, Sniper, what does your room look like?

Sniper: Well mate, I've got two rooms, one in my camper van and one in the base. The one in the base has all of my gear, spare razorbacks, arrows darts and my weapons. It also has some spare Jarate jars, a picture of me mum and dad and a few huntin trophies from back home.

Alright thanks, questions I left out will be answered don't worry.

Demo: Alright, I'm ready, what'd I miss? 

To late Demo, we're out of time.

Demo: **********************************


	4. HHH

Hello, I'm back, and I have a guest, the horseless headless horseman, no Q&A here, just an announcement, so please tell me your questions for HHH.


	5. announcement, Femmeis and marry sues

Hi everyone, sorry I haven't posted in so long. Anywho, I'm not going to be doing any Q&A here but I will be announcing a new addition to this fic: Truth or dares. Yes, I have been infected with the ToD plague that is sweeping the fanfics, but I assure you that all characters will be kept in character as much as possible. Here are a few rules for truth or dare:

OC are allowed, but please send me a description of them

You can ask MY OCs questions/ dares, look at my other stories for details

Please keep everything rated T

Know that in extreme cases, the chars. Will say no, (such as daring Spy to kiss Engineer, Pyro to strip down, ect.)

Now then, on with the characters, today we will be disusing one of the most terrible things to hit fanficdom: Marry sues and Femmies

Spy: I shall start off. Marry sues are ze byproducts of fangirls and boys with either no egos or to big an ego, they are always horrible, there is nothing quite so horrifying as a female heavy, no offence

Heavy: None taken

Demoman: Well I think tha femme demos are cute!

So do I Demo, but please remember that they are supposed to be female versions of you

Demo: You mean all of that anime stuff you showed us was supposed to reflect me?

Yup

Demo: Even the….

Yep

Demo: Time for an emergency keg of whiskey! *runs off*

Scout: I like the girl me

Your femme version is one of the only acceptable scout, as she has an excuse to be a teenager and to have a good female figure.

Pyro: nr hmnt (no comment)

Spy, what do you think of your femme?

Spy: A fine woman, I admire her greatly

Scout: Figures

Sniper: What I don't get is how femme snipas are supposed to make jarate, other than that, I think my femmies are fine

Soldier, what about you?

Soldier: I believe in liberty and justice, but allowing the kind of **** they use to represent me go on the battlefield is just wrong, those little softies couldn't lswing a trench shovel! They should be…

Alright Soldier, we get it, that's all for now though

Soldier: No! I will be heard! I will be…..


End file.
